Almost everyone seems to have a direction in their life right now
Something they can do
Something they have.
The only purpose i ever had was to study.
Basketball, soccer, Computer skills, Body 'sculpting', baking, drawing, singing, card magic.
Why dont i have any of these?
And i can happily lie to myself, brushing them aside saying :
I have no interest
No time
No money
No resources
No talent
No whatever crap i can think of.

All i ever do is go online
I dont even watch TV
Waiting for my phone to recieve a message, waiting for msn windows to pop up
Why the hell am i always hiding?
Always behind a screen
Who the hell gets to know someone new and avoids meeting them
Who the hell keeps mumbling to himself thinking he is perfectly audible
Who the hell walks into the room and feels like everyone is staring him down
Im f-ing irritated with this yet i cant bring myself to change
Everyone thinks im ok, im perfectly normal, and ask why am i so unhappy with myself.
Im retarded at the wrong times, serious at the wrong times.
I never come across as someone respectable
Someone to be admired of
Someone that you can walk beside and be proud of it.
Someone you can talk about and not have anything bad to say.
When i do something nice, go the extra mile.
It's shocking.
Is that why im that bad to start with?

Dont ask me about this im just f-ing tired of all these recurring everyday.
I should shut the music player. zz -.-